Welcome to Becoming Benson. A place where you can come and get endless amounts of realness on all aspects of life.
Just to give you a bit of a back drop, last year was a basic bitch for me. Not to worry, this is not where this turns in to a massive pity party. There were just a lot of ups and downs and A LOT of change in a small amount of time.
Long story short, one day things seemed to be going perfectly fine in our comfortable surburbia home. One happy little family…Me, my boyfriend, and our pup. Then literally out of no where, my relationship of 8 years took a very bad turn and just like that, my life became quite a shit show.
Within two weeks I had packed up my car with a few bags of clothes and my german shepherd, Mace as we made our way from Chicago to LA. Thank God my brother volunteered to come along for the drive, as there were tears the entire way, and plenty of road sodas flowing in the passengers seat.
I had a little stash of cash to get me on my feet, however once I arrived I quickly realized I would need to be making more money than my women’s clothing line was making at the time. So I put my business on hold and started working for someone else’s line, which was another tough pill to swallow.
So here I was, a single 29 year old gal living in LA with a roommate and my german shepherd. This may sound kind of fun to some of you, but for someone who thought they were getting married and going to live happily ever after by the time they were 30, this was far from ideal.
I am someone who has always struggled with my fair share of depression and anxiety however nothing quite like this. I couldn’t for the life of me, figure out how to get rid of the extreme sadness I was feeling. So instead of dealing with my demons head on, I chose to drink almost an entire bottle of wine pretty much every night, trying my best to block it all out.
I found myself in LA a place I had always wanted to live, incredibly unfulfilled, lonely, and depressed. After a few months of this destructive behavior, I finally decided it was time to give myself a swift kick in the butt and start to actually do some work on myself.
I started praying, meditating, journaling, worked with life coaches. I mean you name it and I was doing it. Some things worked for me others didn’t but after much trial and error was finally able to come up with a combo that began to work for me. I slowly began to love myself again.
Although I was starting to gain back a bit self confidence and self love I was still finding myself feeling off in LA. So after endless persistence from my ex, many talks with God, and a bit of a push from my family, ten short months later I made the move back to Chicago (with a new 9 week old puppy I found on the streets of downtown LA. Her name is Lola, more on her another time😉)
I’ve moved back in with my boyfriend and now TWO pups and continue to work on this shit EVERY SINGLE day. Continuing my own self growth as well as sorting through my relationship with my guy. It’s a never ending work in progress, ya know?
Ok, so you may wondering why I’m telling you all of this? See, although at the time things were basically a fucked up disaster (and trust me gals, I’m still navigating my way through ha) I wouldn’t change this past year for anything.
Here is why. ALL of us have our own struggles, right? Heartache, negative self talk, sadness, fear whatever it may be. When you really break it down my situation really isn’t that unique nor much different than any of yours. This my friends is called…life.
The silver lining here, which somehow didn’t hit me until this past year of bullshit, is this. More often than not these trying times, insecurities, etc. have the potential to give us that much needed push towards personal growth, self awareness, and true self love IF we let them!
The trick is of course, learning how to overcome these things, right? While I’ve done my fair share of soul searching, (like I’m pretty sure I’ve read every single self help book Amazon has to offer) I definitely do not have all of the answers. I do however have quite a bit of personal experience in the struggle game and hope I can be a source of encouragement for all of you and vice versa.
I’ve recognized that becoming the best version of myself is a journey, and I mean a long journey, guys. Learning to pick up the pieces when things go to hell in a hand basket, and then attempting to see the light at the end of the tunnel when really all you want to do is a curl up in to a little ball, drink a bottle of rose, binge on housewives, and stay in bed all day. Yeah, not an easy thing to do.
But really gals, my hope is that we can attempt this journey together right here on this platform. I want to share some of the things that have helped me get though this past year and hopefully offer a bit of peace, encouragement, a little weirdness and lots of realness on an array of topics that can potentially help guide us in to becoming the best version of ourselves.
I mean things like self growth, tools to utilize in place of the entire bottle of wine, tips for starting a business you love, relationships, how to use essential oils to enhance your mood, vision boards, law of attraction, reviews on things I’m using, insight on my quirky love for healing crystals, God, health, acupuncture, dogs… the list goes on babes, so stay tuned!